Tucked

Thank you Lord, for granting me today the humble experience of realizing my girlish figure is once and for all a thing of the past…
As much as I love to “tuck” my shirts, my daughter is forever reprimanding this style faux pas on the part of her mother. I try to adhere to the strict rule of style etiquette that forbids tucking of the shirt, but on the occasion when I am layering my clothes I sneak in a tuck. I love the way it feels to have a layer of clothes tight against my torso – a sort of second skin – and given my “thin skin” physique, this feeling borders on the blissful.
Today just happens to be a “layer it up” day, which of course I gleefully realize means a secret tuck for my protective pleasure.
Tucking is always more secure when the tuck includes ones panties. This helps to keep the snugged more securely anchored – a trick I credit to the advice of an old buddy Kay. So after tucking my shirt into my panties I proceeded to pull them up around my flat ass. In the process of doing so I heard the simultaneous sound of fabric ripping as my thumbs broke through the material on either side of my hips. The reflection in the mirror is not pretty. Fonzie gone bad. Two thumbs up on the old hipsters. “Heyyyy!”
A tragedy of sorts. Maybe Victoria Secret would like the patent on these here beauties. They could market them as the new “peek-a-boo panty” or better yet the “tug time teaser” maybe this here situation could render itself after all.
Well, daughter’s advice aside, the tuck is once more my dirty little secret. Besides a little ventilation never hurt – especially if I decide to take these blossoming hips on a little power walk later today….